May 01, 2007

The trip to La-La Land

The other day, there was massive glass-breakage in my house. Mom, host of the family klutzy gene, (and of which I am the sole beneficiary QQ more), retrieved a bowl from the dish rack, lifted it too high, and shattered the glass door of the cabinet sitting above the dish rack.

The tempered glass door, according to her, cracked and then sent a shower of glittering crystal all over her, the dish rack, the sink, and the floor. Except for the fact that it could kill you, it's almost poetic.

As a result, the entire family was tasked with a noble quest: to brave a perilous journey and hordes of unwashed* to find a replacement for the glass door, cos seriously, no matter how slobby and unhygienic you are, you can't have lizards sleeping next to the corn flakes, can you?

The answer to that question, by the way, is no. Don't make the same mistake I did and say, "What's wrong with that?" Mom also happens to be the host of the fire-breathing dragon gene.

At the home of all things undead and woodsy** we trekked to the massive warehouse in an attempt to find doors that fit our 57 by 80 wall cabinet. Wrong move, seriously. They don't bandy around words like "massive" just for fun at the home of our Swedish friends, lemme tell you that.

Anyway, after a nice man told us we're shit outta luck (we didn't know the model of our cabinet, you see) we retraced our steps past the mirror section, back to the kitchenware segment, back up the escalators, over a winding hill and three rivers, and made it to the kitchen cabinet display area.

After looking at each and every cabinet door in that section (and the shelving section, and the office section), we began to be resolved with the sad fact that our kitchen cabinet is probably gonna be drafty for quite some time.

At that point, I was wondering who the hell builds cabinets that measure 57 by 80 anyway? Can't you just round up 57 to 60? I mean, it's only three cm geez, how much wood is that?

Defeated, the family trudged over to The Curve to have dinner (food review coming up next!). Now for those of you unfamiliar with the geography, there's a pedestrian crossing in front of IKEA, and the way it works is, you come to the pavement, glance left, right, and left again, then cross when it's safe.

Note: instructions do not apply to those who're Built Tough™.

Now I'd like to point out something so totally mind-boggling I found it hard to believe I was still in Malaysia. While we were standing on the divider in the middle of the road, cars actually ground to a stop to let us pass!

OMFGWTFBBQ!!!11!one!

I was so totally befuddled I completely forgot my manners and did not raise my hand in a thank you gesture to the nice and sweet drivers. The Oaf and myself talked about this amazing phenomenon all the way to the restaurant (about 10 minutes walk, I guess). What was wrong with them? What's wrong with this place? Are they Malaysian? Maybe they were foreigners (none of us had the presence of mind to look at the car plates, so dumbfounded we were).  Maybe they were newbies to driving. Maybe we've been staying too long in Cheras, where the people are crude and the drivers just plain suicidal. Maybe we need to go out more. Maybe, just maybe, Damansara drivers are batshit crazy.

It just boggles the mind.

On the way back, as we were making our way back to the IKEA carpark, I'm glad to report that cars did NOT stop for pedestrians, and we had to go through the same old routine of self-pity and helpless rage of cursing cars and Fords.

Balance is restored, equilibrium is achieved. The world makes sense again, hurray!


* When I say perilous journey I mean the 3 hour drive from Cheras to Damanasara, and when I say unwashed hordes I mean the masses of people who, for some reason, like to hang out at IKEA.

** Again, I'm referring to IKEA.

3 comments:

Testblog said...

wow.. a sudden wave of nostalgia made me check back into all your blogs and you started writing again<3<3

and cheras drivers aren't suicidal.. we'd rather kill the pedestrian than risk ourselves getting hurt is all. you should know better:)

Seth Chong said...

Nice to see you around taste, heheh. I dunno about you, but I'm suicidal. :D

Seth Chong said...

sorry forgot to log out my bro's acc :p